In Which, I try

So, I try to be a better, more organized person. I rarely succeed but I do try. The following are the ways in which I try.
1. I try not to be addicted to caffeine.
Success Rate: Snowball's chance in hell.
Why: My family is huge for coffee drinking. Like by the pot coffee drinking, I have never gotten big on this bandwagon. My mom will drink a cup of coffee directly before bed. I don't know how she does this except that maybe she has built up such a tolerance to it that it no longer affects her. Who knows. My issue is that I tend to have a little trouble sleeping. Okay, that's kind of an understatement. I have enough trouble right now when I can pretty much sleep whenever I want to. I hate being tired and try to get enough sleep each night. This means I will try to go to bed at a decent time and I have resorted to setting the sleep timer on the TV so it can play long enough for my brain to be distracted and let me relax. (Please don't lecture me on this, I know it's bad but I don't know what else to do.) So, this week, since I have been spending much time at home and I have been drinking some coffee. For me, this usually means a cup or two a day. I have a smallish kind of unique pot and I make a bit and drink it. Yesterday, I exceeded this "bit" by about 4 cups. I felt like I was flying yesterday afternoon. Luckily there were no illegal drugs involved or I'm sure I would have been one of those people that jumps off the roof because they think they can fly. I am now hopelessly in need of coffee, despite it being 2:00 in the afternoon. I need to stop, I know this, I have. (I only drank 3 cups today) I feel the need for caffeine. I'm hopeless

2. The scarf for my lovely mother.
Success Rate: Pfffft. I don't want to talk about it.
Why: The scarf I wanted to make was this one: Branching out I think it is lovely but the yarn was not cooperating with me. I knit about 5 repeats of the pattern and decided that the only way I should continue with a yarn that I wasn't particularly fond of was to block it and see if it was as gorgeous as it should have been. If it was, then I would continue and ignore the whiny part of my brain that says the yarn isn't nice. I blocked it on the needles. It didn't look good. Oh, the lacy part was fine but the bottom had this little swoop that didn't block out. I didn't like it. The only thing I could think that might hide it was fringe and I don't think fringe would look good on this scarf (I think it would cheapen a very nice lace pattern) So I frogged it. Sigh, back to the drawing board.

3. Knit Night
Success Rate: In the dumps
Why: I make these plans. "I should make more knitting friends. The lovely lady at the yarn store is getting to know me by name. I should go to knit night. It is this week after all and wouldn't it be nice to make some friends who knit (in real life)." I tell my husband I'm going to go. (He goes over to a friend's house on Thursdays so he doesn't care.) He encourages me to go. Then the day arrives. I think, I'll get these socks to a point where I don't have to pay attention to what I'm doing and I can visit. Then I don't get dressed very well (my ratty sweatpants and a comfy t-shirt that does not match.) So I would have to change in order to go (at least the pants) Then I get self-conscious because I don't know the people. Then I think about driving 20 miles one way for two hours of knitting and the fact that I want to buy yarn if I go to the yarn store (especially since the yarn for my mom's scarf is not making me happy.) I am trying to save money for Christmas gifts so I am trying to be better about buying things. This strategy will not work. I decide to stay home. I watch more Law & Order (still) until I'm pretty bored and kinda paranoid. Then I go to bed upset with myself that I didn't go. (I think the majority of it is that I don't know the people and I get totally shy.) Well, there's always the next knit night.

Enough with my dissapointments in myself for today. I drew a pretty nice dragon picture for my stepsister last night so all that remains is to color and frame it. we'll see how far that gets today, right now the socks are calling my name. Later.